Friday, July 9th, 2010 at 1:26 PM by Ruth Tynes / Online Editor / InTheTimes.com
Q: I enjoy fashion! But, I have it all in perspective... I dress modestly, I don't freak out if I can't afford the newest designer line, and my self-esteem does not lie in what I wear, but instead on who I am in Christ !
There are a group of girls in the Bible Club at school that gossip about me and try to make others in the group think that I'm self-centered and a superficial airhead just because I enjoy fashion!
I'm starting to dread coming to Bible Club and I've even thought about dropping out because I feel like everybody is looking at me weird and really doesn't want me there... Advice?
ITT: First off, good job for being confident in who you are in the Lord !
"Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose confidence is in Him." (Jeremiah 17:7)
Second, good job for having the proper perspective on earthly treasures.
"Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." So we say with confidence, "The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?" " (Hebrews 13:5-6)
These girls are jealous of you.
"Live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature.
The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like...those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God." (Galatians 5:16-17, 19)
Maybe these mean girls don't understand fashion as much as you do, therefore they don't make “fashionable” shopping decisions, and so they envy your smarts. Maybe there is a boy (or boys) that they like and guys like you instead. Maybe they are jealous of your confidence and beauty.
"If anyone teaches false doctrines and does not agree to the sound instruction of our Lord Jesus Christ and to godly teaching, he is conceited and understands nothing. He has an unhealthy interest in controversies and quarrels about words that result in envy, strife, malicious talk, evil suspicions and constant friction between men of corrupt mind, who have been robbed of the truth and who think that godliness is a means to financial gain.
But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that.
People who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge men into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs." (1 Timothy 6:3-10)
Your presence reminds these girls of everything they are not and are too lazy to work on becoming.
"Lazy hands make a man poor, but diligent hands bring wealth." (Proverbs 10:4)
"As a door turns on its hinges, so a sluggard turns on his bed. The sluggard buries his hand in the dish; he is too lazy to bring it back to his mouth." (Proverbs 26:14-15)
A lot of people are afraid of having nice things because they know what lies inside of them, they know that if they have not conquered a character flaw like greed and they start to have nice things, they will get out of control and fall into sin. So, instead of working on their own sinful nature and insecurities, they make it their goal to persecute Christians who have conquered this sin.
"Brothers, I could not address you as spiritual but as worldly—mere infants in Christ. I gave you milk, not solid food, for you were not ready for it. Indeed, you are still not ready. You are still worldly. For since there is jealousy and quarreling among you, are you not worldly? Are you not acting like mere men?" (1 Corinthians 3:1-3)
Pray about your attendance at Bible Club. You never know who is watching your good example and learning from your strength in the Lord.
"Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom.
But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. Such "wisdom" does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, of the devil. For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice.
But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace raise a harvest of righteousness." (James 3:13-18)
Stand up as a Christian girl and continue to be a good role model, even if sometimes that means standing alone, Jesus knows what that feels like.
"...they bound Jesus, led Him away and handed Him over to Pilate...the chief priests accused Him of many things...but Jesus still made no reply, and Pilate was amazed...knowing it was out of envy that the chief priests had handed Jesus over to him...but the chief priests stirred up the crowd to have Pilate release Barabbas instead..." (read the entire story in Mark 15)
Steer clear of trouble, watch out, and continue to be aware of the mean girls in the Bible Club.
"A greedy man stirs up dissension, but he who trusts in the LORD will prosper." (Proverbs 28:25)
"They do not speak peaceably, but devise false accusations against those who live quietly in the land." (Psalm 35:20)
"Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is Mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord." (Romans 12:17-29)
Don't let mean people kill your passion!
"We know that we have come to know Him if we obey His commands. The man who says, 'I know Him," but does not do what He commands is a liar, and the truth is not in him.
But if anyone obeys His word, God's love is truly made complete in him. This is how we know we are in Him: Whoever claims to live in Him must walk as Jesus did." (1 John 2:3-6)
God gave you your gifts and passions for His glory and for a specific purpose.
"So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what He has promised." (Hebrews 10:35-36)
Continue to embrace who God made you to be, maybe you'll be a great fashion designer one day...we look forward to featuring your designs at InTheTimes.com! (smile!)
Stay strong!
RUTH
* Originally published in the August 22nd, 2008 issue of In the Times magazine. Copyright 2008. All rights reserved. It may not be reprinted or posted without written permission from the author. Please contact for reprint permission.
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